The start of a relationship - Part I

How does ANY relationship start? How does it blossom from mere acquaintances or in some cases - which I frown upon - best friends to partners, lovers?

I know there's no manual to this sorta thing, but I'll try to break it down anyway, according to MY OPINION:

Step One: In the case of a genuine love interest (and not just lust), it starts with two people approaching each other with honesty. Telling the other the truth about the past, about how they feel about each other, how they feel about themselves and where they are ready to go from there.

Step Two: Then it's about the communication. My friend Darren said this before, that the start must always be about the avid communication. How is a relationship - friends or partners - going to even get off the ground if there is no back-and-forth?

I know some of you might disagree. It might be clingy. No, clingy is when you demand to know where a person is 24/7 every second of the day and what he is doing. Clingy, to me, is when you plan your future with him including dogs and houses when you've just known him for 2 weeks. Clingy is when you insist on knowing everyone he knows.

All I want, is just plain old communication.

All I'm saying is, "Can we talk?" (yes i stole that from Joan Rivers)

Let's not even talk about the future. It's too soon for that. Let's talk about our shared interests. Television shows. Music. Fun things that happened to us recently. Clubs and parties. Cute animals we love. Let's keep the flow back and forth. Let's keep things interesting and ALIVE.

For example, I text you a nice little chatty bit about the recent book I bought, and I wait. Two hours later, all I get is, "Haha! That's funny!"

OK, so maybe you had valid reasons.

In the case of my best friends: You were sleeping till noon! (Hi Alaric) You were watching a South Park marathon! (yes Marcus) Your phones' batteries were flat. (Hey Issac) You didn't feel your phone vibrate. (I see you Melvin!)

Maybe, very simply, you were in camp, or hanging out with your friends, or watching a movie.

I get it, I understand. For example, Marcus is training to be a 2LT now, and I don't text him on weekdays. Yesterday I messaged him, and he replied back with a response I have come to expect of him. (Good luck in Taiwan man!!)

But as a potential love interest, all you could give me after that is, "Haha! That's funny!"?!?!?!?!

After two hours, after my effort in typing that funny bit out... you reply with 3 words that take all of 5 seconds to type?

Methinks you're not interested in being more than friends. You clearly don't think there's any point in replying. So therefore, something is wrong. Either I'm overthinking it or I didn't make my intentions clear in Step One.

Step Three: So I'll tell you honestly. What I feel is happening, and either you'll agree - "Yeah. You know, you talk too much. Shut the fuck up." OR "Oh no! I didn't think you'd see it that way. I just thought I would listen to you first cos one of us has to be the listener."

And I'd either apologize if I were really into you: "Oh man, sorry. I don't want to come on too strong. I'm backpedalling now."

Or I would thank you. "Thanks for your consideration! It's okay. I can listen too. I bought a new hearing aid recently."

More steps to come... as I think of them along the way!