My best friend is straight, so it's a funny dynamic we have. Most of the gay people I know have only best friends who are gay, and their circle of friends tends to also be exclusively AJ.
Of course it's expected, because nothing bonds two people more than a common trait like sexual orientation.
But why make things so exclusive?
Can't a straight guy be best friends with a gay guy?
First of all, I have to admit I have some very un-AJ tastes. Sure, I love Lady Gaga and Katy Perry and don't get me started on the Wonder Girl Taylor Swift, but my favorite band in the world is Angels and Airwaves.
I love their fantastic intros, space-inspired atmospherics, experimental style and varied themes. What's more, lead singer Tom DeLonge was formerly (presently?) of another fantastic band Blink 182, and their current bassist Matt Wachter was also formerly from the great great 30stm.
My best friend loves AvA too, and we both attended their first concert in Singapore in 2008.
On top of that, we share a devotion to FRIENDS, and it's funny how we used to quote lines back and forth at each other at rapid speed. I love Phoebe most, while he loves Chandler.
That's not the only TV show we love... SURVIVOR is another big part of our shared entertainment interests. He thinks Russell Hantz's the best, I think Rob Mariano was a hoot back in Survivor: Heroes vs Villains. What a coincidence season 22 features both of them in opposing tribes.
We had both joined canoeing back in our junior year, and we both share a love for fitness and health, what with him being all tall and muscular and an officer-to-be, and me having a weird fascination with pull-ups. We've swam and just hung out at his condo's pool many times.
But go beyond that... and what do we have?
How about a support system?
At first, when I texted him about my relationship woes and troubles, he always ignored them. He would either not respond, or later tell me, "Dude... I don't want to hear about your gay issues!"
My response would be, "I always listen to your girl issues, so could you at least listen to my guy problems? You don't even have to give advice."
It was only fair! He complied with that agreement for a while, until finally he actually said, "OK, why don't I don't tell you any girl stuff at all, and you don't tell me any gay guy stuff!"
That hurt. So I couldn't rely on him to give me a good outsider's point of view when I had relationship woes. I realized maybe our friendship didn't transcend the sexual orientation barrier, which was tragic.
Then recently, I was getting over a really bad couple of weeks where I had been emotionally played. I drunk-texted him rather whinily at 2 am in the morning, something like, "Why doesn't he like me anymore? When he was the one who started this?"
And to my surprise, he texted me back, telling me something like don't be sad, and move on. And word-for-word, quote-unquote, "Just go date someone else."
I was really surprised. And let me tell you, nothing helps you get over heartbreak like your best friend doing a 180 degree spin on his head.
Not only did he absorb the gravity of my emotion, but he actually offered advice!
So... after four years, something finally gave.
Why is he my best friend? He knows how completely and utterly "useless" I am in the armed forces, but doesn't care. ("Hm, why do they still send you on course?") He knows there are better places out there for me. ("Singapore's not open enough...") and of course, he expects me to be his listening ear too. ("I'm gonna get a girl end of this year man hahahaha!")
What more could a guy ask for?
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