I can see how Singapore can be beautiful, in a sprawling urbanized sort of way, a la Hong Kong. I can see how the food is excellent, and the weather can be really nice if you're lucky.
What I can't see is how the people are gracious.
Yesterday I was on the train, standing up, just generally feeling bored and hungry. It was a 20-minute ride to Harborfront MRT. So I pulled out a sandwich and took two bites.
In that time it took for 2 bites, a middle-aged man, late 30s, pulled out his phone and snapped a photo of me quickly. He tried to hide it but I confronted him. To cut things short, we had a loud verbal argument in the middle of the train carriage.
He kept insisting I was wrong and asked me if I was local.
I told him I was born in Singapore, and he went, "Well! So you know the rule! Rules are the rules!" and I kept saying "It was two bites, and you just want that photo to go on Stomp because you want the pathetic name and fame that goes with having people talk about you."
Which is true. You know these kinds of people. Looks ratty, scritchily nervous, and can't make a good name for himself outside if he was on his own.
In the end he declared that if I was so in the right, we go up to the train security and settle this. Of course, there IS that big sign on the MRT train that says "No Eating and drinking - Fine $500", so a smart man like myself had to back off.
(Which left a sour taste in my mouth. I hate losing.)
I don't deny that you're not supposed to eat in the train according to Singapore rules, but I find it interesting that I was taking two bites and that constitutes a fine-worthy crime. For information, in New York City subways, there is no such rule. People eat, and I don't see complaints about how New York City is the WORST place in the world!
A side note here: Singapore, for a long time, has had too-extreme, inappropriate punishments. The death penalty for a drug carrier, for example. Caning for things like graffiti. Singapore tries to establish itself as a country comparable to Hong Kong and New York City, with its global arts scene and concerts and architecture, but those are mere economic yardsticks. Morally, it lacks the willingness to forgive that can be found in other countries. Oh and it also lacks...
GRACIOUS PEOPLE.
Put it this way. It was two bites. A sandwich. I could finish the damn thing in ten minutes. Not a McDonald's Big Breakfast. Not a monster sub. Not a drippy-licky ice cream. My mom once told me she popped a Werther's Original into her mouth on the train once, and some woman snapped at her not to eat on the train.
People, please. There is pettiness, and there is pure ridiculousness. Don't you have anything better to do? Don't you have to earn some money, leave a legacy? Why are you going around picking on people and doing these stupid things?
Singaporeans follow the rules too much. "No Eating and Drinking on the train" means "NO EATING AND DRINKING ON THE TRAIN!!!".
"NOT EVEN A SWEET!!!"
No allowances for that, not even for a guy standing to one side, just minding his own business like me. How about if it was an old woman who looks like she was about to faint due to low blood sugar? How about Lee Kuan Yew? How about a high-flying lawyer? How about... a tourist? Since he clearly insinuated that if I wasn't local I could be forgiven because I didn't know the rules.
You'd better not fucking give me double standards. You want to pick on me, you'd better pick on a tourist too. Since the "rules are the rules".
(Tourists all probably know the fine attached to this rule before they step into this country.)
Look, I was just trying to fill my stomach in the void that is travelling time, which anyone knows could be quite boring. In 20 minutes i could finish a sandwich and be full for the next 3 hours.
Time, to me, is so important, a concept you clearly don't grasp if you decided to snap a photo of me instead of doing something more constructive, like thinking up a new savings or investment plan.
And if you decide to be such a model citizen and be so gung-ho about laws and social righteousness, then you'd better fucking hell make sure if a group of drunk Caucasians or rowdy kids are beating up an old cabbie you'd better go UP there and defend the poor guy.
Do you know how many times this has happened? A woman being mistreated by her husband in public. A poor handicapped man being taunted by a group of kids on a walkway. And yet Singaporeans only know how to stand by the sidelines and watch as the drama unfolds. NOT ONE OF THEM will go forward to offer their aid or assistance.
Instead, all they know how to do is, "EH!! NO EATING ON THE TRAIN!!"
The morals in this country are fucking flipped.
People in other countries need to open their eyes. Every time I hear, "Singaporeans are soo gracious and nice!" I think to myself, "You think? You haven't lived here for more than thirty days. If you do, you'll see the truth."
(Isn't it true? Before 2011, most of Singapore had never voted. And though he got it wrong - you CAN chew gum in Singapore - the BRINGING in of the gum in is a hassle, and they'll treat you as though you were about to commit a heinous crime. Have you ever tried to get through Customs with a plastic bag of Wrigley's?)
In New York, if you need help, people will help you. Because that's how New Yorkers are. In Singapore, if you need help, you'd better hope you have money to fork out in exchange for the aid. If not, they're just going to stand by the sidelines and watch you suffer. No matter how many times you call out, they "wouldn't want to get involved".
But remember, folks, NEVER EAT OR DRINK ON THE TRAIN!!!!!! (Not even plain water!)
P.S. I blame this FUCKING WEBSITE CALLED STOMP.
Encourages people to be petty and constantly be on the lookout for others' faults. It puts forth the notion that you can generate buzz and hype by being nitpicky and fast with your camera phone. You wanna be famous? Do it the Kardashian way and make a sex tape. Don't be a jerk.
The website isn't citizen journalism. It's a forum, yes, it's a place for famous bloggers to talk topics, but calling itself a place for citizen-contributed articles is an incredible misnomer. I have yet to see an article on the website that isn't about someone's food looking lousy or rainbows or eating on the train/sleeping in the Reserved seat. Petty like fuck.
P.P.S. You know that story about the poor young guy who didn't offer his seat up to the 63 year old overweight man with "weak knees"? Firstly, be gracious. If you see someone is in need, stand up and let him have it. Make people happy, comfortable. Make their day, not ruin it. Secondly, even if the guy doesn't let you have the seat, must you smack him on the foot and post his picture all over the Internet? Extreme reaction, much? It's all because of STOMP.
GRACE, Singaporeans. Please keep that in mind as you go about your daily routine today.
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